Part I: The Fallacy
As we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.
- 2 Corinthians 4:18
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Growing up as the only girl in a family with two older brothers, I longed for sisters. A sister with whom to build, share, and keep the deepest of confidences. To foster that special bond afforded to women. I witnessed it between my mother and her sisters. And Mom wanted the same for me. But when severe morning sickness wreaked havoc during her pregnancies, Mom was resigned to her two boys and a girl, despite desiring another daughter.
As such, I sensed my parents compensated for the void being sisterless created in my life. Albeit by far less substantive means, I still relished in the tangible ways it showed itself. Like when Mom and Dad allowed me to choose the paint color I wanted for my bedroom walls. Thrilled, the first color I chose was pink. When Dad repainted a few years later, I opted for green. My love of pink and green bloomed early. Fast-forward to adulthood, and the appeal continued. Fancying an organization adorned in those vibrant colors, I longed to immerse myself in its exclusivity. With admired relatives, church mentors, and notable women being a part of the perceived illustrious Alpha Kappa Alpha (AKA) Sorority, Incorporated, I wanted in.
Though its colors were a lure, I believed AKA facilitated good in the world and fostered sisterhood. With my longing for sisters still strong, coupled with an unfocused undergraduate experience, I was ecstatic when the opportunity to join AKA arose through a graduate chapter in 2009. As an adult, I was not concerned with ‘being made’ through unauthorized hazing practices found on some college campuses. With a string of traumatic encounters stemming from childhood, the last thing I was interested in was being beaten, mocked, and ridiculed. I felt the three-week graduate process would be different. And it was. It helped cultivate the unique sisterly companionship I craved. Learning new things, studying, and forging a bond with eight other women was just what I hoped for. We laughed, cried, and shared testimonies of our desire to unite with AKA. There was not one ounce of misappropriation of power displayed by our mentors in this small graduate chapter. No, these women were by the book, faithful members of AKA. The process was fine until it was not.
Adrenaline pumping. On initiation day we were giddy with excitement positioned behind those closed doors which secured our entry into the sorority. Walking into that solemn darkened room adorned with sacred ritual stuff sent me into a trance, literally. There were candles, an altar, things positioned on said altar. Those same upstanding chapter women were now clothed in uninterrupted white attire and encamped about the room with stoic faces. I failed to register the magnitude of what was taking place. However, the feeling that something was off weighed heavily. But I dismissed my suspicion because selfishly I wanted this. So much so that I placed more trust in the women in that room who had gone before me than I did my own gut. Surely they would not lead me into anything wrong.
The rituals during this culminating step remained a mystery until the events unfolded before us. In hindsight I understand the wickedness. The unthinkable things said. The rituals rooted in sorcery. Words pledged to dark spirits. Kneeling in submission to and bowing before idol gods and dead founders. And most damning, the misappropriation of Scripture. But this organization is far from Christian, because the Word is being adulterated.
I knew this to be the case while on my knees in that darkened room kneeling before the Chapter’s Basileus (president) when she read Ruth 1:16-17. But Ruth said, “Do not urge me to leave you or to return from following you. For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there will I be buried. May the Lord do so to me and more also if anything but death parts me from you.” Madam Basileus was not referring to The Only True and Living God. She was referencing AKA and its dead founders. But in actuality, the Prince of Darkness was exploiting God’s Word for his own demonic plan to steal, kill, and destroy God’s people one by one (John 10:10). It was precisely at this moment that I felt an internal heaviness and prodding to leave. But I dismissed it. Once I did, I knew my actions had grieved The Holy Spirit.
But it did not matter. Because I was blindly selfish and sincerely clueless. My decades-long wish of uniting with AKA was being realized. My desire was overriding God's plan. I had invested my time, learned the organization’s extensive history, and spent the money required for membership. And now I was going to finish what I had started. So after rising from my knees, I became a full-fledged Soror of The Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated, and never looked back. Until fourteen years later when the death of my former student rocked my entire world.
